Month: April 2023

Today, I thought of Mommy, a.k.a. Ma, Sweet Pea, Sugar Foot, and Miss Dee. Throughout my life, she truly proved to be a treasured gift. Just remembering her large doe eyes and witty personality makes my heart smile and my mind travel through all the ways she showed strength, integrity, and love for God and me. She called me her angel and she was indeed mine; a friend whose presence gave me the comfort and confidence no one will ever understand.

I have many cherished memories of our times on the road to Virginia Beach, a weekend in New York, or a vacation in Florida. Mommy loved to drive. A long drive from one state to another, even alone, after the age of 70 was nothing for her. She adored it! So, as she aged and developed some health challenges, her eyesight was not so great, and she failed the DMV optical test. She was not a happy camper, and insisted they were wrong. Yet, as with anything else, she was only disappointed for a short time, and was soon back to her same cheerful mood. I never knew her to be a brooding person about anything. She was determined to be grateful and happy in life. I’ll never forget this and hope I can emulate her.

Mommy was a nurse by trade and loved helping others. She was very intuitive and a great listener and counselor. I really miss even the simplest things we used to do together as well as our many discussions on various topics.

While Mommy was here, she also loved cookbooks, Coke, shopping for clothes, decorating, floral design, singing, and studying the Bible, among other things. I can still remember some of our little spats over why she could no longer drink sodas because of her health issues. Yet, every now and then, I’d grab a small one for her when we were out and about. God knows I had better, as only He knew the wrath I’d incur if I didn’t. I want to laugh as I think about it. Mommy was feisty, yet funny to the very end!

As a child, she taught me there was, and always will be, God, and that I should honor Him with my life and pray to Him consistently. She showed me the importance of learning about Him and trusting Him. Her loving, forgiving, and patient nature showed me she knew Him. The most repeated phrase I remember coming from her lips was “Don’t worry about it.” Mommy was great at this! She had the most phlegmatic personality I’d ever encountered. She refused to worry about anything, and I loved that about her. Being prone to the opposite behavior, I was obliged to take all of her advice when she transitioned to heaven.

Something else I loved about Mommy; she never pressured me regarding living an authentic Christian life. She didn’t badger or demean me but loved me through my nonsense. She briefly but strongly made clear what God expected of me. She simply prayed and left me in the hands of the Lord. Further, I recall only two sentences my mother spoke, on two separate occasions in my young adult life, during a brief period of waywardness. I felt I had to have my boyfriend who was not living by holy standards, to say the least. As I made my way out for another weekend with the one I thought I could not live without, she said, “You’re going to have to make up your mind who you’re going to serve.” The next time, “Remember you’re taking Jesus with you.” Ugh! That was all that needed to be said to get my conscience stirring, as I knew I was wrong. She continued with her church duties as a deaconess and a traveling choir member that took her all the way to Nigeria. Just as she had prayed God would bless her with a daughter after having her son, she later prayed for my protection and that I’d live a life for the Lord. How I appreciate and thank God for her prayers.

Here’s a photo of Mommy as a baby. Grandma told the story of how she left her on the front porch one day to get some sun for a brief moment, and a man walked up to her, and took her from the porch. Thankfully, Grandma got back just in time to safely snatch Mommy from the thief.

The Bible is very clear on how we are expected to treat our parents. “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” (Ephesians 6:2-3) I can only hope that, while she was alive, I honored her in a way that pleased the Lord and made her feel loved.

Perhaps, after a long time, you find yourself single because you simply haven’t received a proposal, your spouse has passed away, you’ve experienced a heart-wrenching divorce, or you haven’t met anyone you desire to marry. Nevertheless, be encouraged–you are blessed to still have time to enjoy those things you love most about being single.

You may appreciate the freedom of not having to check in regularly with your spouse or having to make the many compromises and sacrifices expected in matrimony. Further, you have more time to serve the Lord, free from the hindrance of divided attention to your spouse. Your time still largely remains yours, and the pressures of pleasing a husband or wife don’t exist. Not to mention, you have more time to educate yourself on what makes a healthy spouse. Hence, a healthy marriage.

It could be you’ve often experienced the frustrations of people joyfully entering your life, only to sadly leave for any number of reasons. However, I’d like you to consider, that maybe God permitted each of these people into your life to assist in preparing you for the one you’ll marry. Significant time may have been spent sharpening the rough edges of each of your personalities. Though the relationship may have ended in disappointment, the learning experience was valuable for your success in the next relationship. Your time was not wasted.

Those challenging relationships you encounter in singleness could be essential teachers in helping you learn more about yourself, sparking change, where necessary. These people may be those with whom you may have had to more intently exercise the Holy Spirit’s fruit of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control, which as a result, has strengthened your spiritual and emotional muscles. In addition, I’m convinced that sometimes, God will allow circumstances that will purposely inhibit you from being attracted to someone to whom you should not be committed.

Whatever the case, with Jesus as your Lord, and His Holy Spirit as your guide, you can trust that no one can provide a better spouse for you than your heavenly Father who created the universe. Imagine what He can provide for you, in His timing, when you simply ask and believe. However, that’s if you should even desire marriage. You don’t have to marry.

Remember these words of truth that can be relied upon:

If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. ~James 1:5/NKJV

Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened.  Or what man is there among you who, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? ~Matthew 7:7-9/NKJV

Therefore, I say to you, whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them. ~Mark 11:24/NKJV

Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen. ~~Ephesians 3:20-21/NKJV

In making decisions regarding your relationships, be especially intentional to move in wisdom considering what’s best for your individual life. A decision to marry is one of the most important decisions you will ever make. I’m seriously considering Paul’s advice in 1 Corinthians 7:28: “…But those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this.”

So, whether you choose to commit to the loving oneness of marriage, or the freedom and fun of remaining single, having a relationship with your heavenly Father is of the greatest importance. Loving and obeying Him, you’ll reach your greatest fulfillment!

Sacrifice–not the easiest action to perform–yet a major part of life, involves willingly giving up something for the purpose or benefit of something else. Often, we’re asked to sacrifice time, money, skills, or talents for various reasons. We sacrifice for our families, jobs, and churches. Yet nothing comes close to sacrificing one’s entire life and will for another. During this Easter season, this is what Christians celebrate: the sacrifice and resurrection of the Son of God, Jesus Christ, for the sins of the entire world–the reconciliation of people to God.

As we sacrifice our lives to live for the Lord, may we always be mindful of the matchless value of our Father’s sacrifice of a holy, blameless, life to atone for the darkness of guilty men. Yet amazingly, with the sacrifice of our lives, we gain abundant, eternal life, along with authority and peace that surpasses all understanding.

Thankfully, now the old is gone, and the new has come. We are truly blessed!

—————————————-

I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. ~ Galatians 2:20/NIV