Vowing to do life with someone until death is a noble promise. Therefore, before committing, serious self-reflection as well as assessment of the person one desires to marry should be considered. A careful plan that strategizes one’s route to marital success is necessary to avoid the pain and cost of a heart wrenching divorce.
One can choose a mate solely with the wisdom and knowledge they’ve gained on the topic from various sources such as observation of other married couples; Internet articles, videos and podcasts; or books, friends, and relatives. Or one can choose a mate seeking God’s will on the matter as to the biblical and comparable attributes the person should have, along with God’s preferred timing. This would happen via prayer, Bible study, and marriage counseling. Also, those personal elements of one’s attraction or preference, desired in a spouse, are considered.
Since God is all-knowing and sovereign, one can trust that He knows more about a person than they know themselves. He sees the future of both individuals, knows their motivations and personalities well, and the purposes they’ve been created to fulfill. Surely, He knows what’s best and is happy to counsel for success. We mustn’t forget that His Holy Spirit is also known as the Counselor. “And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another advocate to help you and be with you forever—the Spirit of truth.” (John 14:16-17) The Greek word for advocate here is paraclete which is likened to a counselor or comforter.
Perhaps most important is that one’s choice should be fairly equal in spirituality among other things. “Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with unrighteousness? What communion has light with darkness?” (2 Corinthians 6:14) Yet other things to take into account would be one’s liking regarding: interests, education, career, appearance, hobbies, childrearing, etc.
A rewarding experience rests in spending quality time with the Lord and one’s Bible, pen and paper to learn and record what He would say specifically to you about the spouse He desires for you and how you should best prepare. To do anything less would be unwise in making such an important decision. When we are sincere about acquiring godly wisdom, God is faithful to reveal to us those necessary truths in various ways.
The Bible tells us in Psalm 37:4 to “Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.” So, perhaps we should expect our desires to become His desires as we seek Him diligently. If we’re open to receive from Him, overtime we’d find ourselves learning much about what we should keep our eyes open for in choosing a mate.
Ultimately, we are left with the choice, but God will certainly assist us, if we allow Him to do so. To be successful in choosing, we have to be honest in relinquishing any wrong information we may have held as a standard for a spouse. Remember the wisdom of this world is foolishness with God (1 Corinthians 3:19).
Ms. Rita's Minute 